Chapters:

        
             Near the end of the message I declared, "I am going out into 
        the  world  to find the people of God!  I am leaving  all  to  go 
        wherever the Lord leads me.  I am going to find those hearts  who 
        are willing to trust and walk with God!"
        
             During the last two-thirds of the message I noticed that the 
        pianist,  a  woman  seldom given  to  emotional  expression,  was 
        weeping.   When the benediction was given she came to the  pulpit 
        to  deposit her offering which she had been unable to  give  from 
        her  position  at the piano.  Stopping where I  was  seated,  she 
        stated very simply, "Well--this is it."
        
             And a shout came right out of my heart!
        
             The previous September she had told me, "Rev. Helm, you  are 
        not a pastor."
        
             "Why, Gladys!" I responded, a little amazed.
        
             "Oh,"  she  went  on, "I know that you  are  pastor  of  the 
        Pleasant  Grove Church, but that is not who you are.  You have  a 
        different calling."
        
             And on this evening when God spoke through me the words,  "I 
        am  leaving  all to find the people of God!"--Jesus  stood  right 
        behind her and spoke into her right ear, "Gladys, this is what  I 
        have been telling you about this servant."  She related that this 
        revelation  continued  throughout the latter  two-thirds  of  the 
        message.  I don't believe she ever had such an experience  before 
        this nor has she had one since then.  
        
             A few minutes after she had told me this, I noticed  Charles 
        I.  hugging the shadows of the north wall of the church.  He  was 
        standing with his shoulder against the wall, weeping
        
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        with his hand on his chin.  When I went over to love him he said, 
        "Well--I guess we will be coming along."
        
             We prayed with people for some time that evening at Pleasant 
        Grove  Church.  The meeting wasn't over until  twelve-thirty  the 
        next morning, but still the people didn't want to go home.   They 
        loved me and I loved them.  Oh, how I loved them!  God had always 
        given me an unusual love for my flock.  While we had pastored  in 
        Whitewater,  a minister friend from a distance away had  said  to 
        me,  "I  never would want my congregation to know  what  thoughts 
        were in my mind."
        
             I was shocked.  I replied, "Oh, my Brother, I wish my people 
        could  see into my heart.  If they could see how I loved them  in 
        Jesus,  I  think they would be moved to weeping.  If  they  could 
        know  how I really want to do God's will with all that  there  is 
        within  me, I believe my sanctuary would be full and  the  church 
        basement crowded as well."
        
             The  dear ones at Pleasant Grove Church never did draw  back 
        from  my  ministry  or question me.  Even  later,  when  God  was 
        working  with  me  so mightily, not a  member  or  church  leader 
        opposed  me  carnally.   Of the seven  churches  I  served,  this 
        congregation  simply believed the report.  They didn't get  after 
        me  or  line  me up.  If they had questions  about  how  God  was 
        leading me, they just prayed about them.
        
             And  that night, even at twelve-thirty in the morning,  they 
        didn't  want to leave us.  I carried our three daughters  out  to 
        the  car,  one  at  a time, and started for  home.   We  had  not 
        travelled  far when suddenly, from within the car, I heard  music 
        that  was not of this earth!  "Oh, Honey!" I exclaimed.  "I  hear 
        heavenly  music!  It's right here by the rear view  mirror!   Put 
        your ear over here and see if you can hear it."
        
             But though she listened, she was unable to hear it.  "Oh, it 
        is  wonderful!   It's coming from right there!"  I told  her.   I 
        wanted so badly for her to hear it, for she is a musician and her 
        soul responds to music in the Spirit.  She would have been deeply 
        moved, I know.  It was the first time I had
        
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        ever heard such a heavenly melody, because it was the first  time 
        I had left everything to go with God.
        
             When  we arrived home a little before one in the  morning, I 
        carried the children inside, helped put them to bed, and began to 
        get  ready  for  sleep.  For many years now my wife  and  I  have 
        endeavored to have family worship before retiring.  Many things--
        in fact, nearly everything--will try to stop family worship,  but 
        you will need to do it regularly, either at morning or at night.
        
             You  will  need to worship together for your  own  strength, 
        because,  if  you haven't read the Word consistently  and  prayed 
        regularly,  you won't have the strength to resist temptation  and 
        the Tempter.  The essentials of living an overcoming life in  the 
        face  of  trials and situations are:  consistent reading  of  the 
        Word, prayer, humble witnessing, and obedience to the Holy Spirit 
        through  self-denial.   Jesus will grant you strength  for  every 
        encounter  as  you  obey  Him in prayer, in  the  Word,  in  your 
        testimony, and in yieldedness.
        
             I  was  very much in the Spirit of God as I  came  from  the 
        bedroom  into the front room to get my Thompson  Chain  Reference 
        Bible, which I had laid on the old table my mother had loaned us.  
        Generally I picked it up with both hands, but on this occasion  I 
        reached  for that Bible with only my left hand.  I never  dreamed 
        that  God  was  about to give me one of the  most  wonderful  and 
        significant experiences of my entire life.
        
             As I reached for that precious Book, the Holy Ghost suddenly 
        took complete charge of my left hand and arm.  Moving within that 
        arm  in a way He had never done before or since, God opened  that 
        large  Thompson Chain Bible like it was a little  New  Testament.  
        More perfectly than I could ever describe, the pages of the  Word 
        opened to the Gospel of John.
        
             When my eyes fell upon the page, the sixteenth verse of  the 
        fifteenth  chapter leaped right out, hit me on top of  the  head, 
        and  ran down to my feet.  It said: "YE HAVE NOT CHOSEN  ME,
        BUT I HAVE CHOSEN YOU, AND  ORDAINED 
        
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        YE SHOULD GO AND BRING FORTH FRUIT, AND THAT YOUR
        FRUIT SHOULD REMAIN:  THAT WHATSOEVER YE SHALL ASK
        OF THE FATHER IN MY NAME, HE MAY GIVE IT YOU."
        
             My soul began to laugh, to cry, to rejoice.  I am unable  to 
        tell you what all was happening in my heart, for the glory of God 
        was  burning in my soul.  The experience which I had  enjoyed  in 
        the  service  earlier that evening while under the  anointing  of 
        Jesus  had  truly  been marvelous; but this sacred event  in  the 
        seclusion  of the parsonage was somewhere higher in another  area 
        of  hallowed bliss.  I was unspeakably, gloriously happy!   As  I 
        rejoiced  I started to travel up and up toward the skyline  drive 
        of God's precious Perfect Will.
        
             I  had  right  to  rejoice,  for  this  was  my  Service  of 
        Ordination.   During  that previous week I had  relinquished  the 
        honors  of  men and the approval of most religious  leaders.   In 
        order  to serve Jesus alone and do only His will, I had  forsaken 
        all  that  the earth had to offer, and this was the night  of  my 
        ordination from God.
        
             You  see, my ordination is not of man.  My Calling is  right 
        from the Throne.  I am ordained from Jesus the Christ in  Heaven, 
        for  He  witnessed  this to me in power and  in  the  Holy  Ghost 
        through  the  Word: "YE HAVE NOT CHOSEN ME, BUT I HAVE
        CHOSEN YOU AND ORDAINED YOU..."
        
             The  moment was so sacred and so holy, I scarcely wanted  to 
        move.   I knew myself to be utterly unworthy of  this  experience 
        with  God.   I sensed that I would never be  able  to  adequately 
        convey what Jesus had done for His glory in those brief seconds.
        
             Walking from the front room through the dining room into the 
        bedroom,  I  sat down on the bed.  About the time I  reached  the 
        bedside,  Jesus  walked through the door behind me.   I  was  not 
        seeing  Him with earthly eyes; it was a spiritual vision.  I  had 
        never  before  seen Jesus in a vision, but I knew  when  He  came 
        through  the door.  "Oh, Jesus!" I said.  "You are here!"  As  He 
        came right up to me, I was privileged to see
        
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        His nail-scarred foot.  His presence was to be sensed all  about.  
        The only words I could say were, "Jesus, You are here--Jesus, You 
        are here," and began to praise and honor Him.
        
             While  I  was adoring Him, that nail-scarred foot  began  to 
        turn  away.  I thought He was going to leave me.  "Oh, Jesus!"  I 
        cried.   "Don't leave me!"  I am left alone now and  forsaken  by 
        nearly all men.  I don't have many friends in this world.   Lord, 
        don't leave me!  Please don't forsake me, Jesus!"
        
             And  in the twinkling of an eye I was on my right knee in  a 
        land that I had never been in before.  As I faced the southwest I 
        saw  a  building  of unusual design set in a  landscape  which  I 
        cannot  describe.   Everything was of the Kingdom  of  God.   The 
        hands of Jesus were close to me, and I was just ready to place my 
        uplifted  hands  upon the Master's shoulders, when  I  heard  His 
        voice.
        
             I  heard  the audible voice of Jesus!--The  most  beautiful, 
        resonant, glorious voice of the ages!  It was such wonderful, 
        wonderful sound, that if you ever hear it, you will want nothing 
        more than to hear it over and over.  I heard His spoken  voice
        twenty-two to twenty-four inches from my right ear  say,
        beautifully clear: "I WILL NEVER LEAVE THEE NOR FORSAKE
        THEE."


             (And as I share this with you, God operates within me by His 
        gifts and says:  "I will lead you and guide you and tell you what 
        to do."  I am thrilled that in the midst of sharing with you  how 
        Jesus spoke to me years ago in an audible voice, His Holy  Spirit 
        speaks within me in an operation of His love and tells me that He 
        will  guide, direct, and help me know what to do and  say.   What 
        could be more marvelous in the earth than this!

             (A few of you may receive a little thrill or an operation in 
        your  heart  when  you  read  certain  passages  of  this  humble 
        pilgrimage.   This  is  the Holy Spirit witnessing  to  you  that 
        something is of God.  This is His way of helping you to know that 
        these aren't simply words, but that whatever is being
        
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        shared  is  truly  of Jesus.  John Wesley preached  more  on  the 
        witness  of  the  Spirit than he did on  many  doctrines  of  the 
        Church.
        
             (God witnesses to the body because the body is the temple of 
        the Holy Ghost.  As long as our body is yielded to God, the  Holy 
        Spirit  lives in us from the top of our head to the soles of  our 
        feet.  When He has full control of the heart, He is able to teach 
        and refine us.  But there is much more to be done within us  than 
        we  can know.  Therefore, God continues to refine and purify  our 
        hearts; He repeatedly leads and instructs us in humble ways until 
        we  are  more  sensitive  to  His  gentle  promptings  and   holy 
        guidances.
        
             (We  have only begun!  So, be encouraged.  Never  ask,  "Why 
        does  this have to be like that?"  Or say, "I don't see  why  God 
        has to work like this."  No, no, no.  Don't question, analyze, or 
        attempt to fix everything to suit the intellect.  Simply look  to 
        God, believe Jesus like a small child, and trust the Word.
        
             (Above  all,  don't  let  anything  discourage  you.    Keep 
        pressing  on in faith, in spite of all obstacles, always  seeking 
        to  express  and embrace the love of God.  Be content  with  very 
        little.   The  less you have, the happier you should try  to  be, 
        because  Jesus  promised that the  last shall be first  in
        His Kingdom.  Never permit yourself to be ruled by feeling or by 
        emotion: go by faith in Jesus. Doing these things, you will begin
        to experience a day by day walk with Jesus which the choicest 
        vocabulary will be unable to express.)
        
             After  this heavenly experience in the Kingdom of God, as  I 
        was  lying  on my back in bed with my feet together,  the  loving 
        hand  of  Jesus suddenly came to rest against the bottoms  of  my 
        feet.  I said, "Honey, Jesus' hand is on the bottom of my feet!"
        
             "It  is?"  she replied.  The moment was so hallowed  that  I 
        scarcely  dared  to speak, yet I wanted my companion  to  know  a 
        little of the wonder of God's presence with us.
        
             "I feel God here," she whispered.
        
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             How could you praise God sufficiently for the holy privilege 
        of having the Master place His hand upon your feet?  Praise  God!  
        He was getting me ready to walk with Him.  Glory be to Jesus!   I 
        had been striving to follow Him for about nine years, but now  He 
        was  preparing me to walk on the heavenly trail of God's  Perfect 
        Will.   Hallelujah!  He was getting me ready to go with  God  and 
        not with man!
        
             The hand of the blessed Son of God, the Stranger of Galilee, 
        rested  on the bottom of this unworthy servant's feet  for  about 
        forty  to sixty seconds, then moved.  "Now Jesus' hand is on  the 
        top  of my feet!" I told my wife.  It remained there for  a  time 
        and  then  passed  up to a position slightly  above  the  ankles.  
        Slowly--very  slowly--the  hand  of  Jesus  moved  up  my   body, 
        lingering  for some seconds, then progressing slowly  to  another 
        area.   Each time I could tell where His hand was  placed.   When 
        His hand reached the area of my heart, I fell asleep.
        
             This was my first experience in walking with God after I had 
        forsaken all of the earth to do only Jesus' will.
        
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