A Voice In the Wilderness
by Dr. Loran W, Helm
   
All rights reservered    EVANGEL VOICE MISSIONS     Used by permission
   

Chapters:

  1.  Why Don't Men Obey God?
  2.  My Father
  3.  Narrow Escapes From Death
  4.  My Mother
  5.  My Father's Conversion
  6.  God First Speaks
  7.  Tithing Opens The Way
  8.  Childlike Faith
  9.  A Child's Prayer
10.  Parental Discipline
11.  Conversion
12.  First Obedience
13.  Jesus Reveals My Companion
14.  Sanctification
15.  Our First Pastorate
16.  "Come With Me, Son..."
17.  "...And Perfect Will Of God"
18.  Ordination
19.  Baptized With The Holy Spirit
20.  The Calling
21.  Spiritual Burdens
22.  Leaving All
23.  Waiting On God
24.  Home Built By Faith
25.  Warning From A Watchman
26.  The Beginning



	
1923---A. E. Helm with his first Standard Oil truck.
1925---A. E. Helm with three of his sons: Richard, Warren and Terrance
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          4 MY MOTHER

                                   
             My mother's childhood was so sweet, I understand.  She lived 
        across from her Grandfather and Grandmother Dickson and, oh,  how 
        they  did love her.  She looks back and remembers, "It  was  love 
        always.  I wasn't pampered.  It just seemed that what they  said, 
        I believed."
        
             Often her folks would be gone and would leave her at Grandpa 
        and Grandma Dickson's.  When she began to be sleepy, she would go 
        up  to  her  grandfather and say, "Pap, this  pillow  is  getting 
        heavy."  Then he would get up, fix the pillow on the round of the 
        rocker and rock her to sleep.
        
               "They  lived  what they preached,"  Mother  has  told  me.  
             "Grandpa was an old Civil War Veteran, leaving his family to 
             go   help  free  the  precious  slaves.   The  only   things 
             Grandmother  had  when  he went to war were  her  cows,  her 
             chickens, and what she could raise.  The only money she  had 
             she earned by knitting socks or stockings for other  people.  
             Her  folks,  the  Butlers, came  through  as  pioneers  from 
             Virginia  in  an old ox cart.  Grandmother was  about  three 
             years  old  when they arrived here in  Indiana.   They  were 
             truly godly people."
        
             Loran  O.  Dickson,  my  mother's father,  grew  up  in  his 
        father's blacksmith and wood shop.  He was a skilled mechanic and 
        could make almost anything in iron or wood, but everything had to 
        be just right.  He would work on one job all day to make sure  it 
        was  absolutely correct, even if he made only fifty cents on  it.  
        He was not one to put work out merely to make money, but a man to 
        do the job accurately and precisely.
        
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I remember waking early in the mornings to the sound of my Grandfather Dickson pounding on his anvil. I would ask my mother if I could go down and watch him work, and sometimes she would let me go. I observed him as he put the steel into the intense heat of the coals. If he left the iron in long enough, and if it got red enough, he could do something with it. I would see him take the iron or the steel from the forge, lay it over the anvil, then begin to pound it and shape it. Whatever shape was needed from that metal, round or square, he could form it on the anvil. God is likewise wanting to fashion our lives into unique patterns of His loveliness, but first He must find us surrendered to the fire of His purpose. There is much refining to be done in us, and, as in my grandfather's forge, it requires the fire. Sometimes it is the fire of His love as we wait in secret. Often it is the fire of affliction. Occasionally it is the fire of persecution. But God places us in the fire that we might be made malleable to His higher purposes. I heard a pastor once tell a story of a godly blacksmith who was afflicted much of the time. People would ask him, "Why are you so afflicted? Why are you so tried? If God loves you, and you love God so much, why are you so tested?" And he replied, "When I reach in with my tongs and take out that red-hot steel, I can tell when I put it across the anvil and strike it the first time whether it is going to take temper and bend. If it won't take temper, I scrap it. God is trying to temper me so that I will bend easily to His purpose and won't end on the scrap heap." Most people will not take the temper; they won't accept the bending; they refuse to be smitten. Few are willing to bend from self-desires to the purpose of God. Many persons who begin with Jesus at conversion are unwilling to press on into obedience that they might be shaped according to His will. They get out of the hand of God by going their own way, making their own plans, and arranging their own lives. Few throughout the centuries have learned the mystery
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of God's divine hand molding and shaping the lives of His beloved ones. Oh, how God wants to take out of us the many things which hinder Him. There is so much in a man when he thinks he can still do something in himself. God has revealed to me that we can do nothing but fail. Therefore, He must refine out of us many wrong attitudes and considerable self-reliance before we begin to discover that we are only full of failure. Until we are willing to be nothing, God can shape us very little, if any Grandfather Dickson died in 1941 when I was twenty five. I cannot reminisce long about him without weeping, for he was a man tall in nobility. He was a man of great meekness. Most persons, unless they have been thoroughly cleansed by the Spirit, can sometimes become jealous or angry and rage when they don't get their way. But my grandfather underwent great suffering, and passed through situations which would break you heart if I would share them; yet, he did not complain or murmur. As a boy I can remember hauling gravel, shucking corn, and building fence with him while on the farm. Not once did he become angry with me or get after me. He was one of those rare men who was willing to go the second mile. I can recall that after his hip had been crushed, the doctors didn't know until too late how seriously he had been hurt. The hip joint healed imperfectly and afterwards pained him severely at almost every step. Yet, when Joyce Lee, our first daughter, was born and my wife was recuperating in her parents' home, Grandfather Dickson came to Taylor University to stay with me and assist me. We lived in a little apartment upstairs, and he climbed those steps through much pain in that injured hip with very little said about it. You see, my weeping is because of pleasant memories of a man very rare in the earth. I have seldom seen his like in all of my travels. My father said of Loran O. Dickson and his
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brother, Tom--because of the gracious spirit in their lives--that they stood head and shoulders above other men in the community. He has told me many times, "I wish I had been more understanding of my father-in-law. He was a bigger, greater man than I was able to esteem at that time." It was his sister, Aunt Libb, who was such a gracious, gentle, compassionate woman. She and her husband, Uncle Billy, loved me very much from the time I was first born. I recall Uncle Billy putting on a record of an old hymn: "How tedious and tasteless the hours." The memory of this song lingers in my heart over the years-- "How tedious and tasteless the hours When Jesus no longer I see: Sweet prospects, sweet birds, and sweet flowers Have all lost their sweetness to me. The mid-summer sun shines but dim, The fields strive in vain to look gay; But when I am happy in Him, December's as pleasant as May." -Words by John Newton, 1725-1807 He would sit in the old chair as this precious hymn would play and tears would course from his kind eyes, over his round cheeks, and drop into his lap. As I mentioned earlier, my mother's mother, Elizabeth Dickson, was an equally unique and gifted individual. Her parents came from near Cincinnati, Ohio. Her father`s parents, the Clarks, were religious people. My great-grandfather Clark, a genuine and humble person, did daily work on the farm. Great- grandmother Clark was an orphan girl. Her mother died when she was a baby, so she was passed from one home to another until my great-grandfather married her. She was a step-mother to his six children. Elizabeth often felt that Grandfather Clark's six children loved Grandmother Clark as much as the children of their own marriage. Great tenderness was in her life. Elizabeth Clark Dickson was gifted in caring for the sick. She not only cared for her own family, she was called into
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different homes around the community to help in time of sickness. In fact, families would often ask for "Lizzie" before they would call a doctor, so confident were they of her skills. "She just seemed to know what to do," it was said of her. She was with many women when they gave birth to their children. "I used to wonder where she had gone when I got up in the morning," Mother tells me. "I would get up and find her gone, only to discover a little later that a tiny baby had come to live at `so-and-so's house'." Lizzie had the ability to go into a home and simply take over all the responsibilities. It didn't seem to upset her. Years later, when my father was her son-in-law, he often said, "If Grandma was there, everything was alright. I didn't have any worries when she was present. She was just like my own mother." Elizabeth was a woman of faith, of integrity, of service--a woman of sharing. Her last activity before her mortal sickness was, appropriately, in service to others. While sweeping the church on a Wednesday evening in preparation for worship, she unexpectedly had a severe gall bladder attack. Thursday they took her to the hospital, but at first her fever was much too high for surgery. When they were finally able to operate, there was little that the physicians could do, for her gall bladder had burst. The pain was intense, but she never complained. When the doctor would come to inquire of her condition, she would say, "You have other patients to see about. Don't worry about me." The doctors and nurses in that hospital concurred that she dwelt in the areas of outstanding faith and nobility. One of the leading surgeons of that time remarked that he had never seen anyone like my grandmother Dickson, for she was always wanting him to help somebody else rather than to attend to her. When Elizabeth was dying my mother was beside her, holding her hand. Grandmother had been so weak she could
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hardly move her arms, but suddenly she raised her arms and said, "Oh, child!--Child, there is Jesus!" Amazed, my mother asked, "Mother, do you see Jesus?" "Oh, yes," she answered, "just as plain as I see you. He is beautiful! Look right up there. Jesus is here! Oh--there is a light in The Valley of Death. I see Jesus, Child! He is wonderful. I can see now why all earthly things don't mean anything," she told my mother. "I see now why you didn't want to work in all those organizations," (for my mother had had an unusual experience with God some time before this and had felt led to withdraw from several organizations of men). "Oh, I can see Jesus! He is marvelous!" While my grandmother was dying, she was privileged to see Jesus. When you can see Jesus, all these earthly things don't mean a snap of the fingers. The only thing that is going to matter is whether Jesus Christ has been first in your life; and He will mean so much more to you at death than I can tell you now. And yet, as I say these words--even as I am speaking them--I know that very few will actually hear me. When I am in the pulpit and humbly striving to declare the whole counsel of God with all my might, somehow I have the realization that scarcely any of the people can hear what I am telling them. I will be preaching the best I know, as faithfully as I can, and while I am preaching I can tell that the demon powers are stealing the Gospel truths right out of the people's minds. When the sermon or exhortation is ended, instead of being contrite in their hearts, so often the congregation talks about farms, cars, and ball games. Instead of crying out in brokenness, "Oh, Lord, I am so needy!"--they chatter about home, children, the job, and any other thing but the will of God and the love of Jesus. You see, beloved, my heart is broken in church after church all across this country. The people are precious in every church. They are kind and generous; they would do anything
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to help: but very few are hearing the true Christian message of self-denial, of the cross, of trust and obedience, down deep in their heart. There might be one, two, or three in an entire congregation who are getting the message of true Christianity inside the heart. If dear ones were getting the message, they would be heart- broken. They would be weeping and crying. This is a fact. My heart weeps when I see how lost the world is and how far the church is from God's will. Jesus said, "Blessed are they that mourn, for they shall be comforted." But the professed church has this in reverse: after a man of God preaches, there is often laughter, light conversation, and joking among ourselves instead of repentant tears. It seems that some are saying, "Blessed is the man who has a hi-ho time and is able to get the boys to laugh." Oh, my friends! Jesus cried out to His age and almost no one among the church leaders heard Him. Even the handful of His closest followers, who observed mighty miracles day after day, fell asleep when it came to the hour when Jesus most needed them. And Jesus witnesses to me that the professed church today is spiritually three times more asleep than the apostles were in the Garden of Gethsemane. Think of that!--In about all churches today we are three times more asleep than the apostles were when Jesus needed them most. I am so thankful that my grandmother had a heart awake to the life of Christ so that she could see Jesus as she was leaving this earth. Praise the Lord.
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